Monday, November 26, 2007

The Money Pit

So you're the proud new homeowners! Aww! Congratulations. You've worked hard. You have so many ideas on how to make your new home just perfect. Big dreams, maybe some do it yourself projects, just a tweak here or there. Soon it will be just as you want it.

GOOD LUCK with that.

Our home has been a work in progress, for well, about 2 years now. Sure we only bought the land 2 years ago but that is when progress started. Designing, plotting, erasing, starting again. Then we broke ground and things really got going. Fortunately we were 2,000 miles away and didn't see all the day to day progress but we knew it was chugging right along (I swear that's the only way to have a house built. You be far, far away). Finally the day comes and we move in. Ya there was the punch list, ours maybe a little longer than typical, but manageable. Too bad the dang thing had to go all smoke house crazy on us before we got the list completed, but we just tacked on about 130 little things to the bottom of it and kept our chin up. I mean how long could things take? Really? Well I suppose if things were done according to some sane person's schedule it wouldn't take that long. But this is construction we are talking about. Construction in Tennessee.

Don't get me wrong. I love seeing Bubba and Junior and Bubba Jr and Bubba who drives the red truck and the Bubba who drives that Vega. They are all great guys. We love company. But when Bubba says he wants to start work tomorrow, I make a mental note to at least brush my hair that morning before I send the kids off to school. Maybe even pick up the house a little bit, do some dishes and sweep up some Legos.

So I wait and wait and wait. Maybe Bubba isn't coming over like he said. 2:30 and the kids will be home from school soon. Eventually up the drive comes Bubba!! Now the particular job doesn't sound too difficult, he and his team are to work on paint and drywall in our house. He takes a look around and decides he needs some more materials for the job. He'll back back in 2 days. Is around this time OK? Ya, sounds OK to me, I'll do my errands tomorrow and then the next day I'll be lazy like I usually am and start picking stuff up around noon.

6:30 am the next morning and I hear someone coming up the drive. I answer the doorbell as I lick my finger with spit to try to wipe off yesterday's mascara from under my eyes and there's good ol' Bubba ready for work.

He comes in and starts laying out materials and saws and drop cloths as I try to shuffle kids out of the way before they head off to the school bus. Bubba mentions to me not to worry about a thing as he has 7 kids himself and boy was it a hoot one time when the middle one decided he wanted to take a reciprocating saw to the electrical outlet. About burned the house down that time, but how are kids supposed to learn a darn thing if you never let them touch anything?

Eventually kids are off to the bus stop and Bubba looks like he's making good progress, I mean that big pile of dust seems to show that right? Soon it's 10:30am and it's time for lunch break. Apparently a long lunch break. Kids are home from school. I make a special mental note to keep them away from reciprocating saws. Bubba reappears and says that he's going to have to come back tomorrow, he'll leave his stuff under the tarp where the kids won't be inclined to fiddle with it.

The next morning at 8:30 I was pleasantly surprised to see Bubba coming up the drive. And not only him, but 2 more trucks full of guys. Apparently Bubba decided he wanted to get this job over and done with. I knew he'd come through! I greet him at he door with an enthusiastic "Hi there!" He lets out a sigh and informs me that he has gotten called to another job and needs to take his equipment over there. But it should be a quick one and will be back in 2 days.

So the next day I figure that I may as well go treat myself to a trip to Target after all I had been through and jump in the car for a little shopping. I come home and unload my treasures and then decide to go check the mail. Upon my return from the mailbox I notice a little note on the door. It reads, "Came by to finish job. You were not home. Be back next week."

Next week. WHEN next week. What day? What time?

Sorry. Doesn't ever get any more detailed than that.