What I thought Tennessee would be like:
How it actually is:
I've grown up all over. Born on the Bayou, raised in the San Joaquin Valley, the Southern Sierra's, the Inland Empire, Dallas TX. I am no city girl who cringes at the sight of a June Bug. I have had rats run across my feet, dealt with scorpions, chased off coyotes and my horse and I have walked right over a rattlesnake in the grass (my horse, dog & I encountered a mountain lion once, too.) I've caught gopher snakes in pillow cases, cared for caterpillars until they were butterflies and have milked horses and goats. But I'm here to tell you, very little of that has prepared me to what I would find, and what will be found, in this fine area of the United States called the south. These are not ordinary bugs, spiders and snakes. These are Confederate Crawly things.
Once, in the wee hours of the morning, around 1:30 am, I heard a small commotion coming down the hallway toward our bedroom doorway. We have cats and kids so small commotions are not uncommon and didn't think a whole lot of it. A few seconds later, I hear something that sounds somewhat like a helicopter and it's coming closer. I open my eyes just in time to see a huge insect dive toward my hair. In an act of desperation I throw the bedsheet over my head and let out a yell. This rouses my husband and asks what the heck is going on. When I tell him and turn on the light, he is dubious. We look for the giant insect, but it is no where to be found. I think I heard the husband mumble, "Women." as he rolled over to get some more sleep. I lay in the darkness wide awake. A few minutes pass and suddenly husband lets out a yell and a direct order to turn on the light. The thing had made a reappearance and was trying to take husband as its hostage. We finally spy it on the ground, the thing is huge, and ugly. I trap it in a towel and throw towel and all out into the darkness of the night.
With these things as their allies, I have no doubt that the South will, indeed, rise again.
1 comment:
That spider's big brother was in my New York garage last year ! Those Tennessee butterflies sure look scary though.
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